by “Kayyla,” a Psychic Advisor on Keen*

Coming together as soul mates is a matter that goes beyond loving companionship. It is truly a deep connection. This is about the soul -- that magical, mysterious core of the self that contains the experience of the ages, the depth of feelings that can go into and beyond the deepest psychosis, and a commitment to our source to evolve. We come together with a soul mate in order to grow as a soul by experiencing a love relationship in a body.

Soul mates help us to evolve
To be a human being is not always pleasant. We will be faced with just the right challenges to bring up our greatest fears and stimulate our deepest sadness. Soul mates help us to evolve by moving us out of the usual "box" of behaviors, attitudes and beliefs through which we sleepwalk.

• If we usually act out the role of caretaker, being soothing and understanding, but really feeling betrayed or manipulated, then we have to say so.
• Instead of going to the rescue of a partner, we may have to say, "Look me up when you grow up."
• Or, we may need to take the reins away from a domineering partner and tell them, "You are not allowed to make these choices for me, no matter how well-intentioned they may be," even though it means more work on our part.

Metaphysically, we are all reflections of one another -- and nowhere is this truer than in the soul mate relationship. Each partner's issues are mirrored in each other. That is why there is no truly "good" partner and "bad" partner in these relationships. The partner who appears to be perfect simply isn’t expressing the full truth. Thus, he or she gets to see the "bad" partner act out much of what is within him or herself.

The personality issues of one may be powerful enough to topple the whole relationship
If we were flies on the wall, what we would at first see might appear to be the perfect soul mate union. However, if we were to look a bit closer, we might see something different.

• One partner who is a perennial caregiver -- someone accustomed to sharing deeply with others.
• The other partner is quite likely someone who is used to being cared for -- is good at receiving.
• Or, if not specifically these qualities, we would see well-defined, habitual "roles" that these individuals are used to acting out in relationships.

Due to the synchronistic nature of a soul mate relationship, these roles would ordinarily seem to be quite complementary; however, this time they aren’t working. Why not?

"Roles" can inhibit each partner from fully expressing their real self
Roles can interfere with growth by not allowing one to face and work through life’s challenges. The soul mate in a role-defined relationship picks up the slack or acts out unwanted feelings and behaviors for the other partner, which ultimately hinders the soul’s evolution.

Being part of a soul mate relationship is a lovely and magical situation. We can experience a quality of fullness and love that goes well beyond anything we may have had in our lives before. It is important to remember, though, that we have a higher responsibility in this soul-connected relationship.

All partners experience ups and downs or highs and lows in their loving relationships. We are often tested as to whether we are going to live life in accordance with the reality of our soul, and our soul mate can help us to evolve with these tests. Our connection to each other’s soul will stir things up and love will keep us connected.

*Excerpted from the blog of "Kayyla" from Keen